I'm at work. My cell phone rings. It's my son, Bly, and he sounds more than a little worried.
Bly: "Mom! I'm on the deck and there are these two mallards on the pond. The male has just climbed on the back of the female, he's grabbed her neck with his beak and now is holding her head underwater! He's trying to kill her! He's not letting her up!"
Me: "Um, well, not really, that's just the way ducks make more duckies, Bly."
Bly, sounding relieved: "Wow! I really thought he was trying to murder her. Man, that's violent!"
Me: "Exactly what would you have done if this wasn't a case of mallard hanky-panky?"
Bly: "Thrown rocks at him until he stopped trying to kill her."
Bly: "Mom! I'm on the deck and there are these two mallards on the pond. The male has just climbed on the back of the female, he's grabbed her neck with his beak and now is holding her head underwater! He's trying to kill her! He's not letting her up!"
Me: "Um, well, not really, that's just the way ducks make more duckies, Bly."
Bly, sounding relieved: "Wow! I really thought he was trying to murder her. Man, that's violent!"
Me: "Exactly what would you have done if this wasn't a case of mallard hanky-panky?"
Bly: "Thrown rocks at him until he stopped trying to kill her."
My son...such a gallant...even to girl duckies.
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xoabb
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xoabb
He'd better have taken a damn picture of that. Duck porn. Love it.
ReplyDeleteNo pic...THIS time, Miss Lala. However, I assume this kind of behavior will continue into the spring and I'll get lucky...with my camera. (Note to self: Get your mind OUT of the gutter, girlfriend!!).
ReplyDeleteMallard love, it's not all roses is it?
ReplyDeleteI remember the first time I saw ducks doing the wild thang. I wanted to throw rocks, too. The whole neck biting thing is pretty gnarly.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if there's a market for duck porn?
ReplyDeleteFinally getting around to visiting. I loved this story!
ReplyDelete